It was a dark, cold, stormy night... ah who am I kidding it was a beautiful, sunny day, the skies were blue with not a cloud in them. That dashing man with the gorgeous mane, yeah that's not me I'm right behind him, that scrawny kid with the carrot top afro, back pack and broken leg; yeah that's me. I'm just gonna rest here in front of the hospital a bit and tell you how I got here. I was visiting the local Museum and there I saw her. The most, incredibly beautiful, I mean she had curves in all the right places, her body was so voluptuous I could just eat her up and she was so bright she could light up my whole world, the perfect light bulb! Yup she was the love of my life, I saw her shining there in all her glory in the ladies bathroom.
Well I did the only thing I could, I poked my head in the door and called out " Julie, are you in here love?"
I waited with anticipation. Nothing. So I boldly walked in and headed for my new love. She hung there in all her natural glory, just a plain jane phosphorescent light bulb, but something about the way she shone made her the most spectacular bulb I have ever seen, not even Sylvia could hold a light to her. I even knew what I would do with her when I got home. I couldn't very well put her with the rest of them, she was special, she was going in the box where Silvia now lay. Sylvia had lost her sparkle any way. I approached her delicately, after all she was to become my bride. I put on my leather glove that I had in my back pocket for just such an occasion. I reached up and just as I was about to finish a woman walked into the bathroom, she screamed for a guard when she saw me. I took a hold of my precious Julie and ran out of there as fast as I could, ignoring the loud voices coming from behind me. The confused patrons unsure of what was going on just stood and stared as I ran out the door narrowly escaping the security guards.
I bolted across the emerald green of the grassy knoll. As I crossed the street I turned and saw the doughnut filled, rolly-polly security guard still on my heels. All of a sudden I felt a sharp thud and a pain in my side and all I saw was the bright blue sky as I flipped head over heals, hitting the sweltering pavement. The red flashing lights of an ambulance brought my awareness back. My first thought was where is my sweet and fragile Julie. My eyes began to fill with tears as I see her shattered body sprawled all over the pavement her tungsten filament exposed for all the world to see. Each shard of glass sparkling like a diamond against the pitch black contrast of the pavement.
“Hey man are you ok?! You just jumped out of nowhere.” The paramedic started asking me the preliminaries, “what's my name, what's the date, where are we?”. During the physical examination they discovered I had a broken leg and needed to be taken to the hospital. They loaded me onto the gurney, and called it in. When the doors slammed shut and I could tear my gaze away from my beloved Julia, I looked up and there she was the most stunning fluorescent bulb I have ever seen. I had collected allot of bulbs but none were so special as to come from the inside of an ambulance and that in it's self made Felicia beautiful. There she was calling my name “Jonathan, Jonathan.” calling to me in that seductive hum of her fluorescent voice. My dear sweet Felicia. I had to have her at any cost. I surveillanced my surroundings, the beeps and chirps of the machines, keeping time with the engine. The sterile smell filled my nose. A single paramedic in the back with me, now he head a set of hair on him, lush and blond and oh my, but I digress. I needed to figure out a way to get to my dear sweet Felicia. The ambulance was as safe an environment as you could get which meant that my resources were limited. I had my little utility knife with it's screwdriver and pocket knife but how was I going to get to my beautiful Felicia with this schmuck looking over my every move. I had to think quick on my feet. I've seen the paramedic shows I know they had to have sedatives on broad the question was how do I get to it without suffering the dizzying effects of the sedative myself? I looked at the cubbies hopping they were labeled but no such luck. I had to plan this smart if I didn't want the cops involved. Slowly a plan was formulating in my head, after all I had a broken leg what better way to sedate a patient in pain? I started to play up my injury, wailing in pain as if I was about to give birth to a kidney stone the size of a quarter. The paramedic jumped in his seat startled by my sudden outcry. He then proceed to ask how to ease my pain and I knew I had him. When he came at me with the syringe I used my ninja training to grab it out of his hand and plunge it in to his neck. He tried to radio his partner but the drugs took effect to quickly and he slumped to the floor, leaving me with ample time to grab my beloved Felicia. We made it to the hospital where they put my leg in a cast. That's when I looked up and there she was my stunning Dora.
Well I did the only thing I could, I poked my head in the door and called out " Julie, are you in here love?"
I waited with anticipation. Nothing. So I boldly walked in and headed for my new love. She hung there in all her natural glory, just a plain jane phosphorescent light bulb, but something about the way she shone made her the most spectacular bulb I have ever seen, not even Sylvia could hold a light to her. I even knew what I would do with her when I got home. I couldn't very well put her with the rest of them, she was special, she was going in the box where Silvia now lay. Sylvia had lost her sparkle any way. I approached her delicately, after all she was to become my bride. I put on my leather glove that I had in my back pocket for just such an occasion. I reached up and just as I was about to finish a woman walked into the bathroom, she screamed for a guard when she saw me. I took a hold of my precious Julie and ran out of there as fast as I could, ignoring the loud voices coming from behind me. The confused patrons unsure of what was going on just stood and stared as I ran out the door narrowly escaping the security guards.
I bolted across the emerald green of the grassy knoll. As I crossed the street I turned and saw the doughnut filled, rolly-polly security guard still on my heels. All of a sudden I felt a sharp thud and a pain in my side and all I saw was the bright blue sky as I flipped head over heals, hitting the sweltering pavement. The red flashing lights of an ambulance brought my awareness back. My first thought was where is my sweet and fragile Julie. My eyes began to fill with tears as I see her shattered body sprawled all over the pavement her tungsten filament exposed for all the world to see. Each shard of glass sparkling like a diamond against the pitch black contrast of the pavement.
“Hey man are you ok?! You just jumped out of nowhere.” The paramedic started asking me the preliminaries, “what's my name, what's the date, where are we?”. During the physical examination they discovered I had a broken leg and needed to be taken to the hospital. They loaded me onto the gurney, and called it in. When the doors slammed shut and I could tear my gaze away from my beloved Julia, I looked up and there she was the most stunning fluorescent bulb I have ever seen. I had collected allot of bulbs but none were so special as to come from the inside of an ambulance and that in it's self made Felicia beautiful. There she was calling my name “Jonathan, Jonathan.” calling to me in that seductive hum of her fluorescent voice. My dear sweet Felicia. I had to have her at any cost. I surveillanced my surroundings, the beeps and chirps of the machines, keeping time with the engine. The sterile smell filled my nose. A single paramedic in the back with me, now he head a set of hair on him, lush and blond and oh my, but I digress. I needed to figure out a way to get to my dear sweet Felicia. The ambulance was as safe an environment as you could get which meant that my resources were limited. I had my little utility knife with it's screwdriver and pocket knife but how was I going to get to my beautiful Felicia with this schmuck looking over my every move. I had to think quick on my feet. I've seen the paramedic shows I know they had to have sedatives on broad the question was how do I get to it without suffering the dizzying effects of the sedative myself? I looked at the cubbies hopping they were labeled but no such luck. I had to plan this smart if I didn't want the cops involved. Slowly a plan was formulating in my head, after all I had a broken leg what better way to sedate a patient in pain? I started to play up my injury, wailing in pain as if I was about to give birth to a kidney stone the size of a quarter. The paramedic jumped in his seat startled by my sudden outcry. He then proceed to ask how to ease my pain and I knew I had him. When he came at me with the syringe I used my ninja training to grab it out of his hand and plunge it in to his neck. He tried to radio his partner but the drugs took effect to quickly and he slumped to the floor, leaving me with ample time to grab my beloved Felicia. We made it to the hospital where they put my leg in a cast. That's when I looked up and there she was my stunning Dora.